o plavušama....

Naslov: o plavušama.... Sub Jan 04, 2014 3:20 pm

First topic message reminder :

Stajale dve plavuše na autoputu. Jedna na jednoj strani a druga na drugoj , i sve vreme prva se čudi. Prva plavuša dovikuje drugoj:
- Ej ti, da li znaš kako da predjem preko puta?
Druga plavuša:
- Pa glupačo ti i jesi preko puta!

~slab je onaj koji je izgubio veru u sebe~

Bot Broj poruka : 20181 Datum upisa : 21.07.2016

Plavuši iznenada umre muž. Na sahrani, kuka ona nad sandukom:
• Što me ostavi, crko dabogda

Bot Broj poruka : 20181 Datum upisa : 21.07.2016

Razgovaraju dvije plavuše:

- Znaš da sam u mjesec dana izgubila 4 kilograma.

- Hoćeš li da ih potražimo?

Bot Broj poruka : 20181 Datum upisa : 21.07.2016

Dve plavuse stoje na dve suprotne obale reke pa jedna vice drugoj: "Je li bre kako da dodjem na suprotnu stranu?"
Ova na to odgovara: "Glupaco jedna, pa ti vec jesi na suprotnoj strani."

Bot Broj poruka : 20181 Datum upisa : 21.07.2016

Zašto plavuša igra loto?
Rekla joj majka će dobije k****!

Gost

Ostarila plavusa i počela da ima bore na licu. Čula ona da plasticni Kirurzi mogu zategnuti lice tako da nestanu bore. Ode ona do doktora i zatrazi da on zategne bore. Doktor zategne lice ali posto je plavusa stara, poslije 6 mjeseci nove bore se pojavile. Plavusa ode opet do doktora i zatrazi novo zatezanje lica. Doktor joj kaze:

- "Posto ste vi stari vama ce se bore pojavljivati cesce pa bi vam preporucio novi metod, ugradnju regulatora iza vaseg vrata. Kad god se pojave bore vi okreneta regulator i on vam zategne kozu."

Stara plavusa pristane i doktor joj ugradi regulator. Poslije 4 godine dolazi plavusa do doktora i kaze:

- "Doktore ovo je prava stvar samo ne znam otkud mi ove kesice ispod ociju."

Doktor joj kaze:

- "Gospodjo to nisu kesice to su vase grudi!"

Na to ce plavusa:

- "A tako znaci,sad razumijem otkud to da imam bradicu!"

Gost

Sutra se udajem! - pohvali se plavuša svojim kolegama na poslu. - Hajde
pogodite što radi moj budući muž - ushićeno upita prisutne.
- Najveću glupost u životu! - viknu u glas nekoliko muškaraca.

Bot Broj poruka : 20181 Datum upisa : 21.07.2016

Plavuša ulazi u ordinaciju i kaže:
- Doktore, imam vaginu pektoris.
- Molim??
- Vaginu pektoris! Doktor počne skidati pantalone, a plavuša će iznenađeno:
- Ju, doktore, šta to radite? Doktor:
- Ugradiću vam penis mejker!

Gost

Plavuša otišla da kupi trosed. Ulazi ona u salon nameštaja, prodavac joj preporuči jedan trosed:
• Evo, na ovom trosedu može da sedi 5 ljudi bez problema.
A plavuša će:
• A gde ja da nađem pet ljudi bez problema?

Gost

Pokvario se plavuši auto, pa ga odvezla majstoru. Posle pregleda, pita ona majstora:
- Šta mu je?
Majstor odgovori:
- Ma neki kratak spoj.
- A možete li da ga produžite?

Gost

Pita plavuša lika u baru:
• A, čime se ti baviš?
• Ja sam ti kontrolor leta! odgovara lik.
• Baš te briga, sad je zima, ne moraš ništa da radiš.

Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Sre Sep 02, 2020 9:06 am

- Dve karte, molim - kaže plavuša na blagajni pozorišta. - Izvolite. Vaše mesto je na balkonu. - Ali ja ne bih na balkon! Napolju duva košava!

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Sub Jan 02, 2021 6:53 pm

Pričaju 2 plavuše i reče jedna drugoj:
- "Nova godina pada u petak."
Kaže druga:
- "Joj samo da ne bude petak 13."

„Život je ono što ti se dešava dok ti praviš planove za život.”

Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Pet Jan 08, 2021 6:27 am

- Hoćeš kafu? - pita plavuša drugaricu. - Ja bih ipak nešto praznično - odgovara joj ona. - Ho-ho-hoćeš kafu? - kaže plavuša

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Pon Jan 11, 2021 1:23 am

Šta kaže mama plavuši kad izlazi u grad?

- Ćerko, ako do deset ne budeš u krevetu, vrati se kući!

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Ned Jan 24, 2021 1:05 pm

A kad plavuša pita tipa da li ima cigaretu, tip kaže "nemam, ali imam sat", plavuša uvređeno pita "pa izvini ali kako da pušim sat?", a tip kaže "pa dobro, puši onda pola sata...".

„Život je ono što ti se dešava dok ti praviš planove za život.”

Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:24 am

Došla plavuša na selo i naiđe na čobanina kako čuva ovce.
- Koliko ova ovca ima godina?
- Ima dve godine.
- A kako znate da ima toliko?
- Znam po rogovima.
- Vidi stvarno, ima 2 roga.

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:25 am

Plavuša peca ribu pola sata a riba ni da trzne. U tom nailazi ribočuvar i kaže plavuši:
• Izvinite gospođice ali ovde možete pecati samo sa dozvolom!
Na to će plavuša:
• Joj jesam ja glupa, ja čitavo vreme pokušavam sa glistama.

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:27 am

Priča plavuša prijateljici:
- Bila sam juče kod ginekologa i zamisli, kaže da sam trudna.
- Ko je otac? - pita prijateljica.
- E, to ga nisam pitala.

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:27 am

Razgovaraju dve plavuše:
- Kako imaš lepe zube!
- To nam je u porodici. Nasledila sam ih od bake.
- Ma nemoj! Imaš sreće da ti odgovaraju!

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:28 am

Tuširaju se dve plavuše na plaži i jedna zamoli drugu:
- Dodaj mi tvoj šampon.
- Pa imaš šampon.
- Da, ali na ovom piše da je za suvu kosu, a meni je kosa mokra.

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:28 am

Pričaju dve plavuše:

-Mene moj dečko vara

I mene tvoj dečko vara

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:29 am

Ribolovac priča plavuši: - Ceo vikend sam proveo na kanalu Dunav-Tisa-Dunav.
- Nisam čula za njega, je l' taj kanal na kablovskoj?

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:30 am

Pitaju plavušu u čemu je razlika izmedju ševe i deve ?

"Neznam, nikad se nisam devila "[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:30 am

Pitaju plavušu:
- Vaše znanje iz književnosti?
Plavuša odgovara:
- Imam odlično znanje!
- Ok, ko je bio par sa Romeom?
- Alfa!

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:31 am

Razgovaraju dve plavuše:
- Znaš, svog muža sam upoznala u zoološkom vrtu!
A druga će:
- I, kako su ti dozvolili da ga izvedeš?

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Jan 26, 2021 5:32 am

Idu dve plavuše ulicom pa jedna kaže:
- Vidi mrtva ptica!
A druga gleda u nebo:
- Ja je ne vidim.

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Mar 09, 2021 8:30 pm

- Kakva je razlika izmedju plavuše i šoljice za kafu ?

- Nikakva. Zamisliš želju i ubodeš.

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Uto Mar 09, 2021 8:31 pm

Usla plavusa u radnju i pita:
- "Kolko vam je 3D?"
- "3 marke."
- "Daj mi onda 2D."

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Naslov: Re: o plavušama.... Pet Jul 23, 2021 12:21 pm

Dolazi plavusa na pijacu i prodavac joj nudi krastavac a ona:
A gde vam je kabina da probam?

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